Thursday, July 26, 2007

The pre-teen Battle

To elaborate on one of my worst parenting days ever .......all in one day my 12 year old daughter told me that she didn't even want to be a Christian, my Bible verses were stupid, and the most dreadful...."I hate you" flew out of her mouth for the first time ever. A little too much for one mom to handle in one day! But here is the confusing part, by dinner she had come back to a rational disposition, and even ASKED ME if I wanted to do our devotional together after dinner. ???? We did, and it was really a sweet time.

I am really having to lean heavily on the Lord for how to deal with a pre-teen. It is such an awkward time and girls especially are filled with such a rolling tide of emotions. A lot of moms I know use this as simply and excuse for their daughters behavior, but I am trying to be sensitive to the fact while also teaching her that hormone changes and emotions are not an excuse to act ugly or hateful. After all, she is a woman, so she will most likely have hormones and wacky emotions her whole life. It is probably important to teach her this early on.

It is so hard to find a good mentor when parenting a pre-teen. it is something I have been praying for for a long time. Where are all the Christian parents of pre-teens?? Why is it that our church nursery's are over flowing with babies and toddlers, but our pre-teen programs are scant?? It is such a mystery to me. I don't understand where they all go.

I have lots of friends, but they all seem to have smaller children. I really would love to have an older mom who has been where I am now and give me some positive encouragement. The mom's I usually talk to with kids Tori's age or older usually give me encouragement with comments like...."oh it only gets better!" (sarcastically said) or "oh you think it is bad now, wait until she is 16!!" I wish I had a quarter for every time I have heard that line. For now I'll keep praying for God to send a positive mentor into my life, but until then I will just keep praying everyday.

It brought tears to my eyes tonight when I thought about Tori when she was just a toddler. Little blond curly locks and the sweetest little giggle, would crawl up in my lap and let me read or tell her stories for hours on end. The whole time from then until now seems like such a blur. I don't know how we got from there to here so fast. Although puberty has made those curly locks straight, and her giggle sound a little more grown up, she is still the sweetest little girl just trying to fight against an enemy that is crouching at her door. I will pray with all my might for her until she wins the battle.

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