Last night my husband and I were so frustrated with parenting that I was literally ready to throw in the towel. I feel like our frustration levels are so high, and we are lacking the evidence of fruit that we need to feel encouraged enough to keep pressing on. I prayed last night for the Lord to give me wisdom as well as the encouragement I so badly need right now.
This morning I read Exodus 2:1-10. Jochebed, the mother of Moses trusted God with her son even when Pharaoh's evil was working against her. She trusted Him and he blessed her. I feel like I have a HUGE Pharaoh in my life working against me and my efforts to raise Godly children. My Pharaoh is the world. It's ungodly neighborhood children and their families, school, friends. Every where my children go it seems they pick up on such worldly things and negative traits. I sometimes feel like my efforts are useless and I am loosing to the outside influences.
I can't lock my children up and never let them out in the world (although I wouldn't mind it!) Last week Brady said a curse word (at church even!) that my husband and I have never used, yesterday Zack was talking in the car about Grand Theft Auto...a video game that we have NEVER let him play. Where do they get these things. Unfortunately they do go to public school and I know that is a huge part of it. I think about homeschooling ALL the time but we have tried that before and it didn't work out very well for us. I question my decision on that issue every single day, but my husband and feel like we can't keep putting them in and pulling them out. So until we can make a sound and somewhat permanent decision on the matter we have decided to leave them where they are.
In the mean time, I guess I need to be more like Jochebed and trust God completely for the welfare of my children. Even though it may have sometimes looked like Pharaoh had the upper hand, Jochebed loved God and knew that He was bigger than any of Pharaoh's evil schemes.
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